What I Sow That I Reap - World's Showcase

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Sunday, May 17, 2015

What I Sow That I Reap

Galatians 6:7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
I think vengeance is not a choice for me because of the many experiences I had in my life from the past. While others ,they can take their revenge perfectly but when I seek it ,I won't be able to find it.
Others can destroy easily and stay calm without any payback shot. They may or may not get punished for their deeds but when I try any one of the bad, I will get the payback instantly.

For example, if I scratch a mobile phone of others then mine get scratches in other way in other form. If I intentionally do any bad, then the reaction will be horrible for me. The Newton's third law 'Action and Reaction' works perfectly in my life. I get reactions from the opposite very fastly, within a difference of an hour or a day. Persons like me won't seem to be a fit in this world because this world is sick and need for a revenge and tit-for-tat is necessary in terms of challenges of life in various aspects. That may be a career or a game etc. I will be set to lose if I fight and I may be at the end of the row if I compete,then where could be a perfect place on earth for me to live?  

Other people can play jokes on me and they get over me. But if I try to make fun of others I will get punished. This is also an instantaneous process which I examined many times. This is not due to my physical weakness and I think ,yea at least I think am good in mentality. But got 50% damaged mental behaviour ,I get angry much and jealous and kind of a psycho. I heard many times when my roommate(s) call me a psycho. This is because sometimes I behave very strangely and I think the ' instant punishment ' has something to do with this kind of behaviour of mine. I am experiencing this starting from childhood ,I can't harm people even if I want to. I can't take revenge ,why?

I am unable to laugh much, because if am much happy then I get tears rolling and then cough attacks me very brutally. I can't celebrate in a hardcore party by enjoying because it will ruin me. Am I strange? Yes I am.
Probably its only me I guess suffering with some multiple nonsense disorders. I feel jerk and hard to sign my signature in front of others and I feel uncomfortable to write before others. In past I suffered inferiority complex but now I overcame it and new complexity is this 'sign/writing' . I think it is the major drawback I have currently.

Finally, I am preventing from taking vengeance by a force, a power and a good cause. I am happy with this because I can't harm anyone and thereby living free.

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